chainsaw panda rides a bike

hello summer

2008-05-08T08:05:00.002-05:00

the other day...
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

i've been sitting on the couch waiting for you summer time. temps are to get up to the mid-90's this week. the days of riding and feeling like you've sweat out a six-pack of water are here. i like these days.

some people complain about sweating or find it's a hardship in commuting by bicycle. i think we need to embrace it more. use it as a badge of honor. one of the many things that unite us all as bicycle riders. elevator conversation. you know once people stop shuffling or looking up and then down, say the obvious. 'whew, its a hot day already out there. i rode my bike in. JEALOUS??!' as you stand there looking like a very fit but sweaty heroin addict.

i dunno. im not a scientist or anything. but sweating just feels like a good thing. purifying. toxin releasing (gross) and prolly good for you.

time to put away the wool knee socks for reals. sad but true. i just wore mine yesterday. i tend to push the wool socks as long as possible.

hosiery may still be ok. in the evenings. late at nite. riding slowly. unphased by the drink.

and summertime naps are the best. viva la summer.

we interrupt this program to bring you....

2008-05-06T21:21:00.004-05:00

reptile Kama Sutra.

ooooo baby i love your way......every day......wanna be with you night and day....something something something....everyday....

and then....

2008-04-29T22:33:00.006-05:00

im getting back on this horse. thanks for checking in every now and then. i appreciate it. as usual, there is a lot going on in austin - bicycle related. and otherwise. many friends doing good things for the community. we have a city council election happening right now. and 2 very good pro-bicycle candidates running. its a chance for us to come together and get them elected. the League of Bicycling Voters in Austin made their endorsements - check it out and then get out for early voting.

the final report from the city smarts task force is out. it's hoped this report will continue to help and be substantial in pushing forward a more bicycle and pedestrian friendly Austin.

Yellow Bike continues to thrive. as always, they can use volunteers. and they are good people. doing many things to keep bikes on the streets of austin and introduce new people and kids to cycling. their big birthday party is the end of may. it never disappoints.

and MAY is BIKE MONTH. u know what that means. time to roll up to the stoplight with your fellow cyclists, size up the competition and on green - the time to peddle is now. shine in the moment of passing college students with their u-locks rattling from their front handlebars and curse the drag your panniers are creating. i like to call it the thursday morning commuter start line.

oh ya. i got a new bike.

courtesy fast boy cycles.

cold enough for bear hat

2008-03-08T15:00:00.003-06:00

my friend kate knitted this hat for me. I love it and don't get to wear it enough. it was 31 riding in to sxswi this morning. I'm downtown with the geeks and rats.

texas two step

2008-03-04T11:33:00.003-06:00

shuffle on over and vote today. then caucus later. what are the rules? can you caucus and drink beer? if two steppin is involved....i see no other way....

maybe it was just a little indigestion.

sewing for satan. i made team bean bags for my co-workers. will code and design for hellfire and eternal damnation. and a cookie. inspired by ronnie dio.

last week i actually sat through a segment of rachel ray. i can't not like her, since she owns and advocates for pitbulls. but her show is not very easy to watch. maybe i'm not the right demographic. she had donna from badrap in oakland, CA on with jonny justice. he is one of the rescued pibull from michael vick's dogfighting business. so thank you rachel ray! i promise to try one of the recipes from your cookbook my mom got me. my mom loves rachel ray and i love badrap.

you know its gonna be a good friday when...

2008-02-15T10:10:00.003-06:00

pie listens intently for his next assignment
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

the first words you speak are: "the dog just threw up and ate it. good morning."

so lance is opening a 18,000 square feet bike shop in downtown austin. with showers and lockers and coffee shop and training center even.

Armstrong said he'd like to see Austin evolve into a place like Portland, Ore., where biking is part of the culture and people pedal to work, to restaurants and to run errands. "Walk outside, and the streets are lined with bikes — because they have a safe place to ride," Armstrong said of the city long known for its bicycle-friendly amenities and policies.

cool we wont have to move to portland as we had been discussing lately. hay. i'm all for this shop. the more the merrier. more bikes, cyclists, bike shops, mechanics, coffee shops, free showers. i'm all for it.

i've been on a kick the past few days listening to itunes > radio > all classic hits of the 60s and 70s.

they played cisco kid by war and i can't get it out of my head. right on brother.

the island of misfit hearts

2008-02-14T10:33:00.002-06:00

today for your entertainment and education, we have a misshapen heart in need of surgical correction. cheese knife and petrified frog will assist.

petrified frog is not scared. he is just very stiff. give him a minute and he will loosen up. maybe. either way, he laughs that the tables are turned and it is not him pinned down to a table belly up.

now please close your eyes and lets all hope for the best. you are getting sleepy.....

....and just like that: pretty flowers.

thank you. come again. please take a chocolate on your way out.

someone to lean on

2008-02-12T15:07:00.001-06:00

me and pie nap
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

is it wrong that in the evenings you are excited about morning coming because you can start drinking coffee again?

we had family in town this weekend. it was a good time, ate some yum food, played a few rowdy rounds of the card game Euchre, picked up a box full of pecans outside and played with the dogs. good stuff, but we get worn out from visitin and so me and pie took a little nap.

i'm knitting hearts this week. lets see if i can pull off a few good craftista things before the holiday known as V-Day gets here.

everyone is well aware now that sheldon brown has passed on. i suppose everyone has a story about visiting his site at one point or another. mine was when i decided to go fixed and it was fun to read his articles on stopping/braking. for instance:

"Many cyclists shy away from using the front brake, due to fear of flying over the handlebars. This does happen, but mainly to people who have not learned to modulate the front brake."

modulate the front brake? reminded me of a segment years ago on the howard stern radio show (when it was on free radio) and they had a recording of his dad talking bout proper modulation for the radio and mixed it with some techno. his dad also sings 'the bear went over the mountain'.

so ya anyway. sheldon. RIP. and thank you for your quirkiness and sharing your knowledge.

i went to east texas to visit my mom and pops a couple weeks ago. we hit the big circus, canton flea market. i got some great bargains and finds there. a bunch of homespun yarn someone found in a old abandoned farmhouse. cool.

we also hit up some antique shops in my hometown. i love this kind of stuff.

i picked up a couple old wooden ironing boards and some faded fabric. someone's domestic treasures at one time. im honored.

here's my open mouth breather.

he moves around during the day to hit the sun spots. lays there till he's panting. its like eating hot sauce till your sweating. the texas way.

permission to party requested

2008-02-08T10:35:00.001-06:00

auck! go fetal. play dead. cover your neck. mommy.
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

permission granted. all you local yokels should head to Austin Bikes FEB 9th SATURDAY at 7PM. they are celebrating their 2nd anniversary of surviving and thriving as a bike shop in austin texas. that's 1904 C. Guadalupe. you know the spot. go give sol and eric a big fat hug. they deserve it.

this photo is their shop kitty. don't fuck with him. just pet him nicely. and i think it might be a she. im unsure. i was cowering the whole time.

motion lotion

2008-01-29T10:16:00.001-06:00

thank you hero barista
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

i got into the elevator this morning and an older gent was quickly making his way to get there before the doors closed (hay i did my best in frantic pushing of the close doors button) and then we settled into the frightful small conversation thing that some people feel must happen in elevators.

he began cheerfully, 'good morning. how are you?'
i said i was fine. thanks.
and i smiled.
maybe that would suffice. but then, something wonderful happened.
he said: 'i see you have your motion lotion with you'.
i looked over at him and he was looking down at my cup of coffee.
trying not to giggle, i said: "why yes i do. i hope it does the trick this morning".

and suddenly the elevator doors opened and he made a brisk exit.
motion lotion man has left the building.

so sure, i regularly refer to my coffee as, junk starter, crank infusion, brown blood, zombie defuser....but motion lotion. well this opens up a whole new venue of inappropriate nicknames for my life line to morning.

thank you motion lotion man. i bet you have some real good ones for manila folders and staplers.

dream

2008-01-21T14:26:00.000-06:00

happy MLK daY. my little nothing much but the sentiment is big: in remembrance of today....

we need mlk now. we could use his dream again. is obama him? no. but.... i feel like he has the personality/heart/drive to unite. to bring together. who cares if he's not 'experienced' or the smartest, the strongest, whatever they say. leaders dont have to carry the entire load. they reve up the people to stand up for something. to believe in themselves to effect change. for themselves and for their communities and their country. we need someone to unite and enable a cooperation among many to get shit done. and maybe, hopefully change the course we are heading down. can we have a new day. can i get a amen.

obama/ronpaul? obama/edwards?

anyway....could use a hero or 2 in this mess.....

tom cruise told me not to say that. but i was able to pull myself away for 5min from his gaze of doom and write this up. now i have to go into hiding. if you see me, dont tell him.

attempts to introduce baby polar bears to texas

2008-01-11T13:54:00.000-06:00

doing my part to save the polar bear. bring this one to me. he makes me swoon. i can teach him to like salsa. he can swim in the springs.

new slogan - the lone star state: compadres of the polar bears.

its all in how you look at it

2008-01-06T12:25:00.000-06:00

see i think that i've been posting every day. my brain goes through these little stories of the day and whatnot - have them all laid out. with photos and catchy titles. i mean, is it my fault that thinking a post and it not appearing in your blog has not been invented yet? and when can we expect the idea of stinging and corrective mind bullets to materialize. here's a tip: get stock in that now. its gonna be big.

ok a quick catch up. i took a sewing class and rode congress every nite late home. i called middle lane usually.

we tried to decide whether or not to move someplace else in 2 days before christmas. living on the edge you know. when decisions get hard, retreat to the bedroom in your festive skirt and kick up your heels. remember kids: why try to decide something now when you can put it off and let it fester and eat at you for a few days....builds character.

i walked by this tree swing. but did not swing in it. me and pie did however ride the merry-go-round. thats not pictured. you will just have to use your imagination.

a sewing machine came to live in my house and be my friend. im thankful.

i am making baby vikings. hats.

julie from madison came to visit. we ride bikes.

...to polvos. natch. they served us spiced tea with tequila in styroform cups.

the day came where it was no longer filled with late mornings in bed, coffee in front of the woodstove, sewing, meandering walks with the dogs, slow bike rides to noplace, and lingering evenings of movies. i went back to work.

and today the cold has lifted. its warm enough to open up the house. tula sizes up the day - we agree on a long walk, some sewing and a bike ride for groceries.

pie just wants to know if this photos makes his butt look fat. i told him: no little man. just large and in charge.

laying low

2007-12-24T14:18:00.000-06:00

in our party hats. have fun out there. im gonna go roast some chestnuts. fire.

procrastination and amazing karate killer girl

2007-12-14T09:32:00.000-06:00

does anybody else procrastinate? are there people out there like me? and if so, whats that about? you see.....as i write this, i am procrastinating what i need to get done in order to get out of the house tomorrow. we have a small little family gathering where i have sorta committed (to myself) to handmaking my tiny gifts. down to the wire. life on the edge. people that like making it hard on themselves in order to justify drinking more to take the edge off. well, i dont drink that much. but i may have to take it up notch. and wave my hands around. curse. watch barfly.

a tiny square pillow
a round pillow with contrasting fabrics on front and back and a ZIPPER in the back. yes i put in a zipper.
a drawstring bag
and a skirt with a longer petticoat that hangs out the bottom

i hear project runway calling...

now to make everyone something. that is the goal. but first can we all watch my favorite holiday little video together? it warms my heart.....

The amazing horror masked karate killer girl from mars...wishes you a happy Christmas.

my hero.

knittin mittens

2007-12-05T11:30:00.000-06:00

these are the times when my freakshow extra arm i usually hide comes in handy.

life in pictures

2007-12-04T07:17:00.000-06:00

yes. its that kind of a post. few words. just eyeball on down the screen. i'm going to learn to knit mittens today. i think my life will be complete after this.

i have been listening to samamidon lately. i like his homemade video saro.

as well as tribulation by ezra.

my dog pie is a drooling shakey crack dog when he knows we are about to go on a bike ride. i make him sit and wait several times before we get on the bike. he is a dog with a job.

but we had our first wreck. both got scraped up a little. he looked at me like what are you doing down on the ground? we gots to go...

what is it about finishing projects with me. i've had these pieces knitted for a while now. just got to handfelting them. now they are ready to be stitched up into the all powerful knitted gun with heart bullets. and the surly 'i dont want to be knitted damnit' monster.

pie to the power of 3.

where we sit.

where we hike

tula loves riding the bike too. it was her bday and we were on the way to the pet store. i think she knew.

my friend jason posted up something about why we get out and ride our bikes. you know past any training or getting someplace reasons, and it reminded me why i love riding long rides any chance i get. cleans out the soul. and so i began make time for that again. i rode to buda a couple times, the cabela's outpost for everything that hunts and wears camo. i have this carnival-like fascination with this place.

just lock up to the nearest deerblind.

i saw beaver.

and this very lifeless fishingman. guess he just had one good cast in him. the fish were alive however, but that is only a matter of time....there's plenty of ammunition in this place to take care of that little problem.

gobble gobble hay

2007-11-22T08:45:00.000-06:00

so i have knitted a little heart. next i want to figure out how to knit a real heart. with chambers and arteries. they can use them in surgery. knitted heart says happy day to you.

its finally cold here. YES. coats. hats. wood fires! we had 1/2 cord delivered and i'm like a "twitchy fireman that likes to start fires" ready to start burning.

usually, i wake up early and ride a couple hours on thanksgiving day - before the big dinner. that's been my routine for a couple years now. i ride up to s. 5th where a house keeps chickens and turkeys. they turkeys are lovely. i like to say hello turkey. i seriously wimped out this morning due to 34 degrees temps and 10mph wind. can you say texan? as usual, there is no gradual change in the weather here. its hot. in 6 hours, its very cold and windy. i haven't adjusted to that kind of change yet. it takes me a bit to figure out what to wear in order not to sweat and not to freeze. lame excuse. what can i say...

i got fires to make and sit in front of. here's to you turkey. i'll come by later.

speaking of turkey. and tofurkey. get up right now, put your hat and jacket on and ride over to nut's scavenger race. you won't be sorry. maybe cold. but definitely not sorry.

Day: Thanksgiving
Time: 10 am to Noon
Fee: $0
Start Location: Top of the fake hill on Riverside, sort of across the street from the Stevie Ray Vaughn statue. Fun, weird (wear a costume of some sort!), not nearly as aggro, and short-ish.

make it stop

2007-11-20T09:59:00.001-06:00

night of the living dead line dance.

ben's fall race this weekend and more

2007-11-16T09:34:00.001-06:00

nick doesn't puke
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

friends, countrymen and hooligans....there is much to do this weekend. first up -

1. ride over to ben's annual fall alleycat race. this never disappoints and the weather will be perfect. there is a yellow bike release as well, so lots of folks will be out.

ben is in the red undies.

2. E.A.S.T Austin Studio Art Tour - 2 days. sat. sun. more fun than you can shake a stick at. ride a bike around to the studios too. cars are lame. i wanted to buy this so bad last year.

3. friends to all, the one the only Guerrilla cyclewerx will fix your bike at the Beerland show for $5. they are a xtracycle mobile bike shop that wheels up to events and while you drink and party they fix your bike. throw a beer their way and you are BFF. support the guerrilla. the guerrilla will be your friend.

that's a few things. here's to nick the secret agent messenger and his race efforts at the Tour das Hugel on saturday. it's ~100 miles, 14-15,000 ft of climbing, hitting all of the steep climbs in Austin. Several well stocked aid stations, very grassroots, and free!

yah for bikes. go ride and don't puke.

* up next week: Turkey Gobble Wobble Scavenger Race

sometimes....

2007-11-11T11:44:00.001-06:00

rooms
Originally uploaded by faster panda kill kill

come and visit me in my new room. its the 4th one on the right. i'm going to be knitting and drawing and dreaming and staring out the window and scheming a way to live simply with little money. drawing girls with no hearts, writing beautiful journal entries, eating chocolate truffles, sewing my own clothes, making a home for pitbulls that have been abused and tormented. i'll think up a brilliant plan for my little 4th grade mentee that will fix her ever changing and unstable home and school life. so that she will have a chance and find a passion in her life. then i'll move on to formulating another brilliant plan to take away the lonely and the hurt i see in people's eyes. those that are down on their luck. whose circumstances have propelled them towards hopelessness.

in my spare time, i'm going to learn how to fix up bikes and give them away. i'll fall in love over and over again. and my heart will be crushed just as many times. i'll ride my bike around town to visit friends and drink under christmas lights. i'll sit on the grass at the park and watch the clouds roll by. i'll hang out with my dogs. alot.

you and i will look back sometimes and always be together.

first, i have to go rake the leaves.

get a car dirtwad

2007-11-05T16:38:00.000-06:00

so bruce and claire put on a lovely dinner for some of us when ezra was in town learning how to build bicycle frames from our own man of the weld whitney moyer. we were all discussing how many times folks have yelled out stuff at us as we bike down the roads. and we all agreed that one of our favorites was, GET A CAR!

a bit later, after we kissed the ducks and chickens farewell, we were pub crawlin with the fun between our legs to the drafthouse. the roads are fairly empty and as we gleefully ride along, we are passed by someone who yells out the window: GET A CAR!

YES. perfection. we drank a beer to you dear fellow. and we thank you for your keen and insightful observation that brings amusement to us all. we gotta look into this car thing....

just like zombie hillbilly's

2007-10-30T21:18:00.000-05:00

i predict this smog blog will resurrect itself here shortly and start working again. i hired this lady to start updating it. she showed up blood-stained, but otherwise, neatly groomed.

downlow glow DJ rickshaw bike ride

2007-10-05T16:29:00.000-05:00

currently i'm listening to patton oswalt. we went to see him when he came to the comedy club place in austin. remember bill hicks? its not really like that. but sorta. never understood why bill hicks had to die.

i got to the rickshaw downlow glow DJ blastin bike ride on monday. manny worked with paul from san francisco in welding this DJ booth on wheels. it was impressive. and loud. and good. i'm sure he'll be out on it more now. the test ride had everyone boppin on their bikes.

oded's kids, ezra and noa. my heros.

paul made his bike which sports sound system and microphone

few more here

what day is it

2007-10-04T08:41:00.000-05:00

my dog has a hard time with calendars.

he's getting a little ahead of himself....

for the past three weeks i rode by this every morning at 5:40am.

this is what guadalupe looks like this early in the morning from a bike. i was in a self-inflicted "crack me" period. some folks like to call it boot camp. 2 hours a day of pushups, squats, sprinting, running up hills, callestenics (sp i know), medicine balls, more pushups, did i mention sprints?, running with weights, lots of stuff they refer to as core work, and i think i've blocked the rest of it out.

6-8am. thats what i was doing. then to work, then home, dinner, wash my sweaty clothes, feed the dogs and try to be in bed around 10. then do it all over again. groundhog day.

now that its over, i'm glad i did it. while it was going on, it hurt like hell, i iced my knee every day twice a day, and the second week felt like it would never end. but i think that's how it supposed to be. the waiver i signed said something like, "this will hurt like hell. and we dont care." our class dwindled each week. we ended with about 7 less than started. i heard one guy broke his leg. that's extreme to get out of boot camp. but brother, whatever it takes.

so this is my first week as a normal person again. normal prolly isn't the right word.

i finished up some knitting too. and i missed the biggest ride in austin of the year. the annual moonlite cruise. the minute boot camp ended, i got sick. can i take out a hit on the ragweed in austin? does someone specialize in machete work on the side? lemme know.

if you are a scientist, please don't freak out on the lack of accuracy in these items.